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Tanya I. Age : 19 Partners had so far: 5-10 Favorite sexual position: on top Sexual preferences: bisexual In a relationships now? Not telling you. VIEW PROFILE

FIRST DESIRE OF SEX

- When did you first become aware of a desire to stimulate yourself sexually? What triggered it? How did you do it? How did you feel? Did you have to hide it from others? How did it influence your further sexual life?

I had my first boyfriend. He was 3 years older than me. I cannot say that I liked him a lot - he just happened to be my first boyfriend. Most likely I just felt proud because I was noticed at last. But he really wanted me badly, it seemed. After half a year of hugs and kisses he began insisting we got intimate.

I did not feel like loosing my virginity, I had a feeling that he was not the person who was meant to be my first. I felt that true love was still to come, and he... was sort of a temporary replacement, so let him be for a while... Although I did not really feel like leaving him either. Of course he suffered a lot. Kept telling me horror stories of the peculiarities of men physiology - that without a discharge he was very likely to become an impotent, that it hurt him so bad, that he even might develop a tumor very soon that will require surgery... The point being I was just obliged to 'give it to him'...
But I would not agree even to petting. I was afraid he would get too horny and out of control that I would not be able to cope with him (he was a pretty big guy). That non-compliance of mine got him swinging from anger to despair. Once he almost got to his knees begging: 'Just take your clothes off, let me at least (I quote) fucking jerk off at you!' We were sitting in a kitchenette of a single-room flat. I did not want to be alone with him and naked under no circumstances.

And here I noticed there was a latch on the door from the kitchen side. Almost whole of the door was made of glass. I pushed him out of the kitchen, latched the door from the inside, and felt at ease. He would not break the glass, would he? He was in the corridor, looking at me. Slowly I started stripping.
I came to enjoy the situation. It was safe and exciting. He had all his clothes on, but I saw his hand moving in his pocket. Teasing him I started assuming different positions as lascivious women I had seen in movies and magazines would.

I got excited myself. While doing one of those 'exercises' I stroked myself between the legs and felt the pleasure getting stronger. I had never masturbated before; just fantasizing was all I had done. I discovered how nice touching myself felt and continued caressing my vulva.
In the meanwhile he unzipped his jeans and was masturbating looking straight at me. When I saw the size of his cock I was happy I had not gone to bed with him. Although I found the sight of a guy masturbating extremely exciting. I came up very close to the glass and saw him come. White jets spurting on the glass almost as high as my breasts. I was happy for him, but mostly for myself.
...(continue)

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